User Profile

I have several interest .......Most are illeagal, moral, carcinogenic, or fattening....Others include listening to loud evil music,going to concerts and beating up little kids in the mosh pit, raining doom down upon the filthy heads of my doomed enemies,trashing bass guitars,flying machines,playing with explosives,building,breaking and fixing computers,building a better mouse trap,going to funerals on acid,stalking Janeane Garofalo, alcohol abuse,ploting world domination,goth girlz,more evil loud music,pissing off Scarlett,Brockian Ultra Cricket,abusing Hooter girls and needle point......:-)

I little bit about more me? Well lets see.....No, I never was in Vietnam. I never once drove into an empty swimming pool. I never let the carpet walk right out from under me.....I never did become an exotic dancer,or a customer service representative.......I never took the pulse of a dying duck,or gave mouth to mouth to a horse fly..... In a way, I suppose you could say my experience is quite limited. For example, I never locked Oliver Cromwell in a broom closet while singing Waltzing Matilda, I never sawed a television in half, although I once saw Wendy O. Willams saw a guitar.......I never played a decent game of jacks, I never played poker with a toothless one eyed pirate who kept picking his teeth with a bowie knife to distract me, while his parrot looked over my shoulder and told him what cards I had by using an elaborate code involving vomiting,squawks, and sea chanteys......I never bought a lamp.......wait..... I did buy a lamp once.....But I never bought a lantern,or a lambskin prophylactic.....I never bought lima beans,lime pudding or a Lionel Richie album......I never bought anything beginning with the letter "L" , .....except lollipops, light bulbs and lettuce..............and the lamp. I never laid down for a nap and woke up with the Everly Brothers in bed with me......I never let a cyborg take out the garbage...........O.k........As you can see I tend to ramble......but you'll get used to it..... :-)

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